Falling into Heaven
by Angeleia Kenobi
Summary: This is a companion piece to The Reason for Fear. It's been eating away at me for a while now, and hopefully it will cure my writers block. Please read and review... or PM me a review... rated for a reason.


_ "To be honest, I thought you'd never ask." she looked up at him then, and he noticed the fear was gone, replaced by something he could only hope was love. He leaned in to kiss her, and found himself falling into heaven._

Or more accurately, found them falling into the trunk of a tree. "ugh." she grunted against his lips, tearing her face away as he pushed himself off from her. "Ow." she rolled her right shoulder, frowning. "Oh no... no, I'm so sorry, Felyca." He turned her around, his hands running up her back to see what damage his eagerness had caused. Thankfully it was only a small tear in her shirt, no blood was drawn and he sighed thankfully. "So whats the verdict." she asked, turning back to face him.

He looked up in surprise, "Huh? Oh, you'll be fine." he ran a hand through his hair, suddenly more nervous than when he'd asked her to stay in his tent... if that was even possible. She bit her lip, the towel over her left shoulder threatening to fall to the dirt, "Alistair, you're not losing your nerve are you?"

_Yes._

"No, that's not it, at all! Not that I want to seem over eager..." his face flushed, over eager was exactly he had been. He'd pushed her back into that tree, wanting so much to be a part of her, finally, that he'd hurt her. "I must sound like a fool." She giggled, and cupped his face in her hands. "I think this might work better if we were inside the tent, no?" He smiled, briefly, and let her take his hand leading him into the flimsy shelter. He'd set it up just close enough to the fire to get some of it's light and warmth, while far enough that the fabric wouldn't set aflame if left unattended for any amount of time. She turned to him, barely able to stand up inside, and gave him a gentle smile, "Here. Now, if we happen to fall over..." she bit her lip and looked at the ground.

"Alistair, there's something I probably should tell you..." she said, trying not to focus on him. Her eyes roved everywhere,the cloth of the tent, the support poles, the ground, her feet, her hands. She glanced at the bedroll once and he could have sworn that her face turned beet red, "I, uh... I lied.... to you before... about the, uh..." her hand came up and rubbed the back of her neck.

_Maker, she's going to back out on me. I knew I shouldn't have leaned her against that tree!_

"The truth is, I..." her shoulders slumped,defeated as she whispered, "I've never licked a lamppost in winter." Her teeth snagged her lower lip, clamping down hard to give her something to focus in as she waited for his response.

Alistair's eyes widened, "You mean..." she risked a glance at him, then looked away just as quickly, "You've never... _either_?" she shook her head, her face now completely scarlet. "Why did you say that then?" She shrugged, "I thought you were talking about literal lampposts. I have licked a lamppost in winter, just not... a _**lamppost**_ _**in winter**_." His eyes nearly bulged from their sockets as he watched her. She looked so different now, here in the minimal light of the tent. Her hand still rubbed her neck while her hair, freed from it's ponytail, fell down her back in gentle waves. She had changed from the formidable woman that could save an entire village from an army of undead, into a frightened maiden about to give up something she could never get back.

Chantry raised or not, he knew about the birds and the bees. He knew that the first time for a woman was hurtful to her, it was one of the reasons why the priests had beaten it into him to be nice to a woman. To never take her for granted or advantage of a nice demeanor. He was beginning to forget his own nervousness as he thought it over. Someone needed to take the lead here, and it very likely wasn't going to be her.

She sighed and looked up at him, the color on her face fading slightly, "It's not like I ahven't thought about it. Andraste's knickers, I asked every question I could about it. I thought I understood everything there was but... when you asked me to..." She sighed, defeated, "I care for you so much, whenever I think about this, I feel like a complete idiot, all... wrong." she blew out her breath, "I wish I could be better at this.. I want it to be right. You deserve it to be right. The last thing I want for you is for your first time with a woman to be something you'd rather forget."

_Maker's breath, she's babbling! She, the Grey Warden, is babbling!_

Alistair shook his head and stepped forward, taking both of her hands in his, "I told you earlier. I think this is as right as it gets." she stared up at him, a faint smile teasing the corners of her mouth, "With darkspawn hot on our heels, death awaiting us at every turn? Sure, _hot_." He smiled, "I'm willing to give it a shot, if you are." She laughed, a halting nervous laugh. She was relieved that he still wanted this, Maker knew she wanted it. She'd wanted it ever since she'd first laid eyes on his bare back that time in camp.

The way his muscles had rippled beneath his skin, it had made her heat in ways she'd never experienced before. She'd watched him several times during the course of their travels, seen the way he held his sword and shield. A firm grip the showed his inner confidence, even if he refused to acknowledge it aloud. The way his body moved while under attack; it wasn't the flowing grace of a rogue, she got enough of that from Zevran, but more the athletic strength of a warrior. She lowered her eyes, swallowing several times before speaking again, "Alistair, I'm more than willing."

She could feel his smile as he inched closer to her, running a hand through her hair, "I'd hoped as much." She looked up at him and licked her lips. His fingers tucked beneath her chin, and he lowered his lips to hers. This time he was careful, wrapping his arms around her waist, pulling her close. She gasped as he tucked her against him and he took full advantage, his tongue tickling hers. No kiss they'd yet shared was anything like this. One hand stroked her back while the other tangled itself in her hair, the new sensation sparking his nerves. She ran her hands up his arms to his biceps, her fingers digging into the hardened muscle. He groaned against her and she pulled back slightly, her chest heaving as she tried to take a full breath, "I think..." she started, putting a hand to her throat, "I think this would work better if we weren't..." she ran her hand along her neckline, "clothed."

He blushed slightly, and chuckled, "I think so too." she bit her lip, then lowered her hand to the shirts laces at her throat. She tugged gently on one of the strings, the simple knot coming undone easily. Alistair watched her move, the way her hands slid down her body... he never could have dreamed that something so mundane could possibly be so erotic. Her arms made an x across her belly as she grabbed the hem of her shirt and she pulled it up over her head, discarding the thing somewhere out of sight. His breath caught in his chest as she looked up at him, her face openly fearful.

She was gorgeous. Her belly was flat and he could just make out the lines of her musculature while the bones of her hips just peeked out from the top of her leather breeches. Scattered across her skin were faint white scars, given her from various enemies. Enemies he knew he'd failed to stop from attacking her. Her arms came to hang at her sides as she waited for him to say something... anything really. After a few tense seconds of nothing, she began to fold her arms around herself protectively.

_I knew it. I knew it, I just knew it. Felyca, he doesn't find you attractive and is about to..._

Before she could finish her thought, Alistair's hands reached out and grabbed her arms, "Wait... don't. I want to look at you. I've watched you for so long, I..." He smirked, "Well, please? Let me learn you." she chuckled silently and swallowed, "Here." she whispered, moving his hands to her bare waist. "You want to learn? The best way is to feel." She was getting some of her confidence back, he could tell. His breath was hot on her shoulder as he inched even that much closer, she could feel his body heat through the cloth of his shirt, when he inhaled his chest was agonizingly close to hers and it made her flush all the way to her navel.

Or was it what his hands were doing? He'd moved his right hand up her side, using just enough pressure to not tickle, reaching out with his senses to feel everything. _There, the lower edge of her ribcage. One, two three... what's this?_ He'd come to the flimsy bit of cloth stretched tight across her bosom, and he gave her a strange look. She smiled gently, then guided his hands back to where it clasped behind her. Leaning forward, she showed him how to undo it, then let the garment fall to the floor, her breasts bouncing free. He swallowed thickly, unable to stop the schoolboy grin that was now plastered to his face as he raised a hand to investigate this new-found flesh.

He paused when she stopped breathing, his palm covering her. She smiled, "Don't worry, Alistair... I hadn't thought that it would feel like this." His brow wrinkled, "Feel like what." She bit her lip, "When you touch me, it's like a river of liquid fire is running down my spine. When you grabbed this," her hand closed over his, working his fingers into her soft flesh, "I couldn't breathe, it was so intense." He pulled gently on his hand, "If you couldn't breathe then..." her face showed her surprise, "Oh! No, no not like that. Alistair, it was the good kind of not being able to..." she closed her eyes, "Alistair, that feels so good. Please don't stop." His smile returned and his fingers began to knead against her. Her breath came in short gasps, and her head fell back, exposing the smooth lines of her neck.

She looked so tempting like that, he just had to take the silent invitation. She gasped as his lips touched her throat, then let out a soft moan as he left a hot, wet trail from her chin to her collarbone. He stopped again, lifting his head to look at her. She bit her lip, then smiled, "I think we'd better lay down, Alistair. If you keep doing that I'm not likely to be able to keep standing." He raised his eyebrows, then nodded. Releasing his hold on her, he watched her take several breaths before nodding herself and kneeling on the bedroll. One arm came around her chest, covering her breasts and pushing them in such a way that they swelled against her arm. Her other hand moved back through her hair and she shook her head, smiling, "You know," he moved to sit beside her, "Whenever I thought about this, I never expected it to be..." she giggled as he reached for her arm over her breasts and he gave her a look, "What is it?"

She bit her lip, and released her chest, making him stop breathing for a moment, "I was just thinking. Here I am, topless, and you've yet to remove any clothing." He looked down over himself, still clad in a linen tunic and leather breeches, "Heh, well what do you know. You're right." He moved to remove his shirt when her hands stopped him, "No... please? Let me." he held still as her small hands ran down his torso. She found the lower hem and tugged gently, then pulled the entire thing free from him. She inhaled sharply at the sight of him; even in the half light of the tent he was beautiful. The hard planes of his pectorals, the sharp creases of his stomach made her own stomach lurch and she bit back an appreciative groan.

_Is it even appropriate for me to... He touched me..._

Slowly, her hand came closer to him, her fingers just grazing against his skin and it made him hiss. She stopped, drawing her hand back, but he shook his head, "No, wait. I see what you mean about the good kind of not breathing." She smiled, and raised both hands to his torso. Her fingers glided over the curves and creases in his stomach, her palms smoothing the soft skin. "Strange..." she whispered, her brow wrinkling with curiosity. "What, what's strange." She looked up at him, her hands now on his upper chest, "You. Whenever I touched you through your armor, you were solid, like a stone wrapped in metal. But this... this feels like nothing I've ever felt before. Almost like... like steel wrapped in velvet. No, not velvet.... Silk maybe." His eyebrow shot up into his hairline, "Steel wrapped in silk? Darling, you're going to have to...." He paused, "Now what?" she was looking at him strangely, but he got the distinct impression that it wasn't a bad thing.

"Say that again." He glanced around them, "What? Darling?" He wasn't prepared for the heat of her response. As soon as the word had left his mouth, her lips were working against his, her arms wrapped around his neck and her fingers curling into his hair. He sat there, frozen for a second before his own arms circled around her, pulling her close and holding steady as he leaned her back against the bedroll. She gasped against him as his weight settled above her and her hands pushed against his chest, "oof." He braced himself on his elbows, looking down at her. "Sorry, I didn't mean to..." she shook her head at him and smiled, "Don't worry so much, Alistair. I don't bruise that easily." His breath caught as he felt one of her legs wrap itself around his thigh, pinning him against her.

"Now, what did you have in mind?"

His heart pounding, he moved one hand to her breast, playing with the soft flesh, making her nipple crest into his palm. Curious, he moved his hand slightly, and let his thumb brush against the stiffening nub. "Do you like it when I..." Her soft gasp was all the encouragement her needed, and he let his thumb circle around the darker area before he got another idea. Watching her carefully, he lowered his head to it, and let his tongue flick across it. Her mouth opened completely as she moaned loudly, her eyes closing at the flood of sensations running through her. He smiled and licked her again before taking the nipple completely into his mouth, suckling her gently. "Oh, Alistair." she breathed, making him look up at her, expectant. He couldn't have imagined the look on her face, pure bliss and need. _Need_. He knew what that looked like, knew what it felt like too. He could feel his own _need_ growing insistent inside his pants, making them nigh unto uncomfortable.

Forcing himself to slow down and focus, drawing on all the training he'd ever gotten, he lowered his mouth to her other nipple, teasing it just as he had the other. Her gasps became more insistent, her fingernails digging into his skin of his shoulders as he toyed with her for a moment longer, "Alistair," she breathed, her voice almost nonexistent, "Alistair, you're not playing fair." He lifted his head to look at her, then raised an eyebrow, "Playing fair? What do you mean."

She bit her lip, then raised one shoulder, "Would you be willing to let me try something?" He drew even further away from her, making her shiver it the sudden chill, "Well, there's something that Oriana told me about... I was wondering if I might.... do it for you." He knew Oriana was her sister in law, and he also knew that women talked about such things... but what was she thinking of? "I... I don't know... It's not going to hurt me, is it?" She brought up her other leg, using her foot to push against the ground and roll them over so that she was now above him, her hair falling around their faces. "Only if I do it wrong..." she said, her breasts smashed between them, making his heart thump a little louder. She pushed herself off from him, sliding down his body so that she was straddling his right thigh. He leaned up on his elbows to watch her as she traced her fingers down his abdomen, stopping just above his belt, "So, do you want me to do this?"

Alistair watched her carefully, then nodded slowly. Her fingers made quick work of the laces at his navel, then she pulled gently on the leather. "I'm, uh, gonna need your help here." she said, and he lifted his hips enough for her to pull the garment free from him. He closed his eyes as he felt the cooler night air against his skin, waiting for her to do something. Instead he heard her gasp in surprise and it made him stare at her, "What? What is it?" She swallowed hard, her hand frozen just below his dancing shaft. "I never expected... I mean, I was told of course but..." she shook her head and looked at him, "That's HUGE!" the shock on her face didn't register right away, and as he processed what she'd said, "Excuse me?"

She bit her lip, then reached for him again, tentatively. As her fingertips brushed against him, she whispered, "When I talked with Leliana about this, she'd said that if a man's hands were large, then so was his...um," her face flushed again, "**member.**"

"Big hands?" She bit her lip, tilting her head to the side as she let her fingers investigate every vein, her pointer finger running along the sensitive underside and making his breath hitch. "Or maybe it was big feet." She shook her head, moving her fingers through the tight nest of curls at his base, "I thought she was kidding but now..." she shook her head in disbelief, "I owe the woman a whole sovereign now." He knew the fact that the two of them had taken a bet on whether or not he was... gifted should have bothered him, but if he backed out now he might not regain his nerve. Instead, he tucked it away in his memory to berate the bard later, and let the feeling of her hands on him take over.

She'd moved back to his shaft, having wrapped her hand completely around it, and tugged gently. "Ah!" he panted, his hands clasping around her wrist. "Let me show you how to do that." As he put his hand over hers, she watched his face sort through the different emotions. First was relief, she could well imagine that having something like this for very long would grow painful. Then desire, unbridled passion, his mouth opened with that one and their hands were moving faster. She pulled away then, and his eyes flew open, "Wh...why did you...?" She looked at him, then brushed her hair back from her face. With her first hand still holding him, she lowered her mouth to the tip of him, and her tongue darted out, just brushing against him. He tasted like salt, sweat and had a smell like nothing she'd ever smelled before, and she loved it. Feeling a bit more adventurous, she opened her mouth and circled the tip with her tongue before lowering her mouth to cover the end.

Alistair inhaled sharply, then sat up suddenly as she adjusted her position to kneel between his knees. "Darling..." he hissed, and she pulled away from him, "I don't think I can take much more of your teasing." Her brow wrinkled as she let him pull her into his lap, only her own breeches between them. He caressed her cheek, then kissed her again. He felt the muscles in her thighs tense, then relax as he ran his hands down her back and cupped her hips, making her lean back to look at his face, "Alistair, I..." he kissed her again, laying her back on the bedroll, taking over once again. "I can't wait any longer, dear one." he whispered, nuzzling her neck as he made his way down her body, "I have to see you. All of you."

He fumbled with the laces, then pulled rather harshly on them, ripping it away from her body, smallclothes included. There she was, every inch a woman, and he loved her. The triangle at the apex of her thighs was parted slightly, it had to be as her legs were still wrapped around him. He ran his hand up on leg, his fingers tickling the sensitive flesh. She shivered against him, a light chuckle coming from her lips, "That tickles." he smirked, then did the same to her other leg, his finger stopping just short of the tangle between her legs. "Maker's breath, you're beautiful." He looked her over, with her hair spread beneath her on the blankets, her body flushed with desire and her chest heaving as she tried to regain control of herself.

_Maker's blood, you don't deserve her._

He bit the inside of his lower lip, then let his curiosity take over. He slid one finger over the center of her torso, and relished in the sharp gasp she gave in response. So he did it again, and again and again, and each time she would gasp and writhe against him. Finally, when his fingers began to twitch, he dropped a little lower, to the small entrance at her core. He heard her stop breathing as he ran his fingers just aside of it, then slid one finger inside, just to the first knuckle. She was hot, tight and wet. Something he hadn't expected, but was glad to learn. Slowly, he removed the finger, then thrust into her again, deeper this time, and was rewarded with her hips lifting to accept him. "Alistair... oh, Alistair..." her voice was haggard, as though she was trying to not be too loud. Her fingers were twining around the blankets above her head, her head digging into the bedroll as she arched against his hand. He pulled out one last time, then thrust again and met resistance.

_That's it. Proof. She wasn't lying about that... maybe... I don't want to hurt her. She's been hurt so much already..._

He removed his finger, running it along her inner thigh to wipe herself from him, then moved above her, watching her face. "My love, if you want to stop this... If you think that I..." her hands came to his shoulders, "Alistair, please. My mother told me to wait for the one who I thought was perfect. I can't get any more perfect than you." she raised up slightly and kissed him, "I love you." His heart swelled when she said it, and he took himself in one hand and guided himself to her entrance. Her breath hitched as he gently pressed against her, parting her just enough to antagonize. Her tongue flicked across her lips, and she whispered again, "I love you, Alistair. Please..."

He moved slowly, that voice in his head demanding that he move faster, but he wouldn't. He wanted this as much as she, but this first time... no, this time he would do everything he could to protect her. To show her how much _he_ loved _her._ He met the barrier, and looked into her eyes. "I love you too, Felyca. Ever so much." then he broke through.

She hissed as pain laced pleasure tore through her lower half, fighting the urge to jump away from it, she closed her eyes and bit her lip. "Easy, my darling, easy. Take your time... adjust." He didn't know where he'd heard it before, or why he was saying it to her now, but it seemed appropriate. He was surprised at the feelings he was getting from this. Her body sheathed him completely, fitting around him perfectly. She was just as hot and wet as she'd been with his finger, but now the sensations were almost too much for him to handle. He could feel the pressure building in his thighs, the overwhelming need to **move, **but he would wait. He could hold on just a little longer until she... moved.

She laid still, letting her body acquaint itself with this new feeling. She'd never felt so... full before. Even when she'd eaten that whole barrel of salted cod in Denerim had she felt like this. Her body was swelling, growing as it moved without her command, taking him deeper without her moving. He was just so... this, was just too perfect. The pain she had expected, but the absolute pleasure that came along with it... she sighed inwardly as she planted her feet and tilted her hips backwards, taking him into her very soul.

They groaned together as he moved within her, sliding against her inner walls as carefully as he could. "Alistair... Alistair, please..." she managed to gasp, one hand curling in his hair while the other gripped his arm. "Oh, Maker." he growled, raising himself up onto his knees, his hand grasping her hips. Her feet slid back to rest near his calves as he moved faster, driving himself closer to that waiting edge. He couldn't wait any longer. He had meant to give her a chance at pleasure first, but this... He couldn't hold back. It was so close, so close he could almost...

She let out a soft wail, drawing him back, just enough to slow his actions. He looked down at her and marveled at her beauty. She lay before him, legs now tight around his waist, holding him to her as her body shook with tremors. Her eyes were closed and her jaw slack as her head rolled back, arching her chest towards the ceiling. Her growl turned guttural and he inhaled sharply as he felt her body contract around him, drawing him deeper, clenching around him in such a way that he couldn't... "Oh... yes!" he gasped, plunging into her again, and again until he felt his own release take him.

She felt the warm liquid surge into her, his body bending over her as he panted for breath. She didn't care, she was on her way back down to earth herself. Her breathing was ragged and forced, her eyes closed as she tried to regain some semblance of composure. She felt a hand son her cheek and her eyes flew open. He was watching her, carefully. "Are you... I didn't..." she smiled at him, "I love you, you great worrying fool." she lifted herself up, kissed him gently.

"And I you." he whispered, slipped himself from her and laying beside her. "Maker's blood, I love you."


End file.
